Pity Post

It’s an established fact in our house that I am not the puker. Husband went through a phase while we were dating where every time I was dressed up so we could go someplace fancy, he would get sick and end up puking somewhere. I am not the puker. Yesterday, though, I was. Which just figured, because Husband was out of town.

I started out the day feeling okay, and then things went downhill fast. I was having to run out of my classroom every 20 minutes, until finally I went to my principal and said, “I know this is my first week back, and I feel terrible about this, but I really need to leave.” I made it about half a mile away before I really lost it. Luckily I had a trash bag in my car from when we were worried about my water breaking somewhere while we were out. It was bad. I had to swerve across two lanes of traffic to get to a parking lot, and then stopped literally in the middle of the parking lot. People were driving around me and glaring at me until they saw what I was doing, and then they would give me horrified looks and move on.

Instead of picking Liv up from daycare, I went home and took a nap. I actually did the math in my head about how many diapers I sent with her, and how much milk, and calculated how long I could sleep before I needed to go get her. When I picked her up, I managed to get her out of the door and into her carseat before I threw up again into a bag I’d brought with me just in case. The daycare owner walked by, and I wanted to say, “I’m not drunk! Or pregnant!” Nothing like making a good first impression.

I am convinced that the worst thing that has ever happened to me is being pretty much incapacitated while I have a baby to take care of. You know your life is taking a downward turn when your goal for the day becomes not puking on your kid. Luckily, she’s still at the age where all she really wants is to sleep and be snuggled, so we did a lot of sleeping, which of course meant she was up every couple of hours all night. I wish my first weekend post-daycare with O was a little less puky and a little more healthy. I’m hoping that after a day of toast and water, I’ll be back to 100%. The good news? It’s one way to lose weight…


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